Online
dating is a dating experience that allows individuals to contact and
communicate with one another over the Internet. Over time online dating has
been used more and more and is becoming a “normal” thing to do. Many people use
online dating to find a variety of relationships: serious relationships,
hooking up, or even just meeting someone they can connect to. In a 2011 study
by Match.com approximately 40 million people use online dating services. That
number is increasing as time goes on as well.
Another interesting statistic I found is that as of 2013, approximately
1/3 of marriages happen due to meeting online rather than face-to-face. That is
beyond incredible to me. In an article on psychologytoday.com it shares the
pros and cons of online dating and how there can be some excellent experiences
as well as some endings that do not go as well.
In this
article by Jeremy Nicholson he describes the works of “Finkel and associates”
in 2012. Nicholson is referring to Eli
J. Finkel, a Ph.D. Professor of Social Psychology. Finkel’s goal was to evaluate whether online
dating was fundamentally different from face-to-face and to see if it was
superior to face-to-face. After their study they concluded that online dating
was definitely different from the traditional dating style, but it also
proposed problems. The three main areas in which online dating differed from
the traditional style of dating was access, matching, and communication. For
each of these three main areas, Finkel found pros and cons. First, with access,
online dating provided people with many varieties of other people. However,
with so many choices of people, someone can be easily confused and become
overwhelmed and can just continue looking for “Mr. or Mrs. Right” instead of
finding a good and stable relationship. Next, with matching, online dating
offers many different tests on compatibility which enables people to find a
better dating partner. On the flip side
though, matching becomes a difficult process and may not always be accurate for
everyone. People may present themselves as something that they’re truly not
which makes people attract to them which could cause them to miss their perfect
match. Lastly, communication through online dating is obviously a pro because it
allows you to get to know someone before you make any kind of commitment. It is
also a con though because communicating through computers lacks the kind of
face-to-face communication that is needed which makes it harder to match up
with somebody online.
I chose
this article because some of my friends and I have recently used online dating
apps such as Coffee Meets Bagel for example. In using this app I have noticed
that there are pros and cons such as Finkel had described. While using it, it
has provided me with many of options of potential partners that I would have
never have been able to link up with without using the app. However, there are
so many people on the app that I am unsure of who to talk to and who not to
talk to. On the app, you are allowed to fill out a bio and put different things
that you like, but I have run into the problem with many people lying in their
bio which is a con of matching as described by Finkel. My last problem I run
into is not having that kind of face-to-face communication with someone which
makes me stray away from online dating more and more.
Just recently I have stopped using
all kinds of online dating services/apps such as Coffee Meets Bagel and Tinder.
I personally feel that online dating is on the rise and that it is not for
everyone. But, it seems to be
unavoidable if you are single. In just writing this blog I have had the TV on
counting the number of online dating commercials I have seen. In the hour that
I have taken to write this, there have been eleven online dating commercials (including
re-runs). That is absolutely absurd to me and is why I feel as if online dating
is unavoidable. As I said, it may not be
for everyone, but if the pros outweigh the cons then online dating might be the
way for you to go.
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